Soldier
by Miranda Panda-chan
Summary: One-shot. He should’ve noticed from the very beginning the fake masculinity of her voice, her too soft features, the fairness of her skin, etc. But he didn't, and now he can only ask: Is he a man of honor or a soldier first? ShangxMulan if you squint. RxR


**Disclaimer: All rights go to Disney. Not me.**

**A/N: So, I've hit the bottom of my bottomless pit. But whatever, I couldn't help myself. I haven't watched that show in forever, and I watched it again recently and it was just BOOM! Idea. So yea. Review? **

**

* * *

**

Soldier

**By Miranda Panda-chan**

* * *

All she could do was stare at him with eyes that held wisdom past her years in them. He couldn't help but feel resentment towards her. He'd worked so hard teaching and training, his greatest accomplishment—turning the worst soldier into one of the best—had all been a lie. He'd trained a traitor, a woman—unworthy and worthless, cunning and underhanded—a backstabber. How could he have been so blind? So ignorant? He should've noticed from the very beginning the fake masculinity of her voice, her too soft features, the fairness of her skin, and her uncalloused hands.

"You know the law." Anger washed over him, anger at himself for his own lack of observance, anger at Chi Fu for nagging at him and being the thorn in his side and the fly buzzing in his ear since he became Captain in the first place, at the world for making laws that were dumb now that it was having to be followed, and finally, at _her_. His blood boiled with righteous fury as he came to her in his own mind, she'd betrayed him, he'd given her his trust. He'd given her his trust, and he was repaid with this?! He was repaid with a lie?!

Fine.

They were even now, although it felt as if he'd still come out with the short end of the stick. Hell, he didn't think either of them actually won. She'd taken out the Hun army, millions of soldiers with one rocket. One. She'd saved China.

_She'd saved him_.

And now she was getting death and condemnation in repayment.

Most soldiers would've just tried to save themselves, most soldiers would've left him there to go over the cliff with the snow as limp as a ragdoll, and as fragile as a China doll when it came to the jutting rocks down below.

He'd been prepared to die for his country, for his father, for his honor, and for his emperor. He'd thought he was the finest soldier, able to look death in the face and not fear it, but was he really the finest soldier if he couldn't follow age-old laws known by all ages of both genders?

He didn't know anymore.

As he looked at her, huddled in the snow, cringing and biting her lip probably due to the injury she'd received from Shan Yu, looking so small and insignificant, a mere shadow of the person they all came to know as Ping. Even as she stuck out her neck as he picked up the sword while giving a death glare at Chi Fu and then looking solemnly ahead at the small girl that had more strength than anyone he'd ever known, nothing could stop the feeling of despair that swept over all who stood to watch the scene, excluding Chi Fu. She wasn't traitor. He didn't care what she'd done to get where she was, if that meant breaking the law, then so be it. She'd gained his trust, something not offered very often, and his respect. She'd just wanted to protect her father. She'd risked her life, her family's honor, her own honor, her country, and her future to save her father from certain death.

But even so, he was still a soldier. His governing officer was the law and the Emperor, and this girl held nothing over either.

And he could feel his resolve breaking with each step he took toward her.

He stared down at her as she willing offered her head to him, willingly offered her life to uphold honor.

Honor? He scoffed at the thought. Such a stupid, menial thing, why was honor so important anyway? What did it do for you if all you got in the end is something that you would never actually receive because you would be dead? Honor was something that didn't help anyone at anytime.

Honor could kill itself for all he cared now. Except that honor was the only thing that could possibly keep her alive now. Honor was the only thing he could use to save her from certain death.

He threw the sword at the ground in front of her, disgusted with himself, her, Chi Fu, the law, and the everything. Why couldn't it be easy? Why did he have to be stuck with a bunch of idiots? Why did the single best soldier out of that bunch of idiots have to be a female? Of all the things that could've happened! Why. Why? Why! Why?! WHY?!

Chi Fu started to stutter something out as he walked back over to his soldiers, not looking back at the girl that he knew would probably never make it out of the stone cold mountain range. That could probably never go home again if her father had a clue as to what she'd been doing for the past couple of months.

"We're moving out." He ground out as he lifted the arrogant mousy counselor off his self-made pedestal and into the air. Chi Fu stopped his stuttered mumblings as he saw the look in the Captain's eyes. A look that said if he kept up with his complaints, the sword would go through his neck instead of hers.

He would always be a man of honor before he was soldier. Honor was what got her into this mess, and honor was what got her out. And he would rather be wrong if doing what was right would kill her. Not Ping, nor Mulan. Because he'd been friends with one, and he wouldn't mind being something more to the other—but he'd kill himself if he was forced to kill either.

Because he wasn't sure if all the honor in the world could've made him kill her in cold blood.

**

* * *

**

A/N: Please Review!


End file.
